Red O'Grady was only 14 when he was conscripted by the Union Army. Silas "Dakoda" Wyld joined of his own violition. Things went horribly wrong for the both of them during the
Battle of Shiloh. Red was captured by Confederates, while Dakoda was seperated from his unit. He wandered and was captured by Indians. He later gained their friendship and learned to like living with them. Unfortunatly, foraging Confederates killed them off, and took Dakoda prisioner.
Rotting in a POW camp, they were both shown their death certificates. They were marched to the gallows, when the news of Lee's surrender saved them.
Waiting in the camp, Col. Paddock freed them and reassigned them to his fort. After a week of military life, the Col. told O'Grady and Wyld that they were assigned to be bodyguards of a Mr. Opaque on a mission to Sante Fe. They road out with the effete Mr. Opaque by stagecoach, and boarded the train at Akron.
One day into the trek, the train was overrun by the Heffer Gang. Red and Dakoda were stunned to see a fellow traveller, and Englishmen calling himself Mr. Lime stand up and attack. While no slouches with a gun, Wyld couldn't help but be amazed at the gunnfighting skills of Mr. Lime. Dispatching nine of the twelve Heffer Gang members, Wyld and O'Grady collected the reward. Mr. Lime was no where to be seen.
Making it to Sante Fe, Red and Dakoda were saying goodbye to Mr. Opaque. He informed them that he still needed protection as he was going to continue his journey into Chiuahuahua, Mexico. They telegraphed Col. Paddock who ordered them on. Pausing at a local saloon, Wyld noticed that Mr. Opaque, for some unknown reason, was afraid of four gentlemen playing cards. The four were odd, but richly dressed men. One was dressed in all white, one in all gray, one in all black, and the last in purples, blues and was wearing red and green spectacles.
The following moring, Wyld bribed the saloon keeper and found out that the four men had no weapons, were very polite and paid in many different types of currency and gold coins. Wyld had never seen the odd currency before. the saloon keeper also showed him the book that the man in white signed when he stayed the previous night. His name was
Joseph Athanasius Kircher Leaving on horseback for Mexico, Wyld taught Red how to ride, while Red taught Wyld how to dodge. All went well until hours into Mexico when Red noticed they were being followed. Two natives were spotted with rifles. Mr. Opaque called to them in an unknown language, and they responded with friendly gestures. They took the group to their villiage, and fed and sheltered the group.
The following morning the Indians took the group to some Aztec, or Toltec ruins where El Papaguayo used as a hideout. Mr. Opaque explained that El Papaguayo was a
Mestizo that fancied himself a pirate. He dressed in colorful clothes that earned him the knickname "the Parrot".
When they got to the ruins, Mr. Opaque gave El Papaguayo a satchel of gold, and he directed him to a stair way in some broken, ruin of a temple. They went to the bottom when they found a glowing
metallic rod. The rod gave off every color in the rainbow. While looking at it, Wyld pulled his gun on Mr. Opaque, and demanded answers. While this exchange was happening, Red noticed the wall was opening and out came a strangly clad man with a bowl over his head. The bowl was filled with dirty water and what apeared to be eels.
Red freaked out and slashed at this man with his Bowie knives. Wyld shot twice, hitting Mr. Opaque, once in the neck, and the other in the shoulder. The man in the strange silver metallic suit hissed and stretched in an odd shape, and Wyld and Red panicked and ran up the stairs. When they got up, El Papayguao ordered his Indians to open fire. Wyld, while running down the stairs, fired at El Papayguao, hitting him three times in the head. Red evaded by diving down.
Wyld ran while reloading his gun. The man took off his helmet revealing itself to be a
monster with a squid for a head. One of it's four tentacles hit Wlyd in the neck, wounding him. Wyld reached out for the glowing rod, and burnt his hand on it. The pain renderered him uncouncious.
Red came down the stair and found the creature feeding on Mr. Opaque's brains. Red opend fire, and killed the creature.
Red heard gunshots from upstairs, and grabbed Wyld and carried him up the stairs. He saw Mr. Lime pointing a pistol at him. Mr. Lime demanded the key to Mr. Opaque's lock box. Red didn't know what to do, so he moved out of Mr. Lime's way. Lime then kicked over the altar, and pushed the lock box over the rod and closed it. He carried the box over his shoulder and gave Red a silver coin.
The coin had Queen Victoria on one side, and the symbol for M13 on the other. He said to go to the English Embassy in New York, and they would take care of everything.
Red treated Wyld until he regained concousousness. Red and Dakoda made their way to New York where they collected their rewards for the Heffer Gang, and cashed in Mr. Opaque's gold. They were given papers discharging them from the army, with honors, and Wyld had two custom pistols built.
Red wondered about what Mr. Lime said about reading the
Kama Sutra.He went to a library and found a copy. On the back was a silver nitrate image of its author, a man Red recognised to be
Mr. Lime.